:: letting go of a person you've just learned to love
:: reminiscing the good times you shared together
:: shielding your heart to love somebody
:: trying to hide what u really feel
:: trying to hide the tears that involuntarily fall from ur eyes
:: loving a person too much
:: giving up someone you never thought of giving up
:: having the right love at the wrong time
:: taking the risk to fall in love again
:: hiding ur relationship from someone else
:: controlling ur feelings to avoid hurting a friend
:: thinking of his every waking and sleeping moment knowing all the while that he never even thinks a single thought of you
:: letting go, because everytime you see the person, you only fall deeper
:: holding back only to find out when it's too late, you both felt the same way, but were only scared to lose each other so much that you didn't let the feelings out
:: falling inlove with someone you didnt mean to fall inlove with
:: finding the perfect guy.. with only one problem.., he doesnt love you
:: helping the one you love court your friend
:: seeing the one you love crying for someone else
:: the waiting also hurts like hell
:: having to hear "..I've met someone"
:: agreeing to his wish to 'just be friends'
:: asking his freedom back because 'he'd be happier with her'
:: asking you to 'forget that everything happened and be 'normal' friends again
:: hearing that you're treated as a li'l sis
:: sharing his future plans for the girl with you
:: you stopped being friends because his gf asked him to
:: being denied in front of people
:: telling u lies where he'd been when actually, he was with a 'new friend' or an 'old flame'
:: he told you he'd be leaving you to return to his ex
:: breaking someone's heart
:: fighting for that one thing that would make you happy
:: PRETENDING you're OK when inside you're dying..
:: PRETENDING to be strong.. and RECOGNIZING your weakness lying in bed each night, thinking of that special person you can never have..
:: being with someone you can't actually love..
:: pretending you don't love a person whom you actually love..
:: being IN LOVE..
:: letting go even if you really don't want to.. having no right to say you are hurting because it was your decision
:: seeing the person you love hurt because of you.. and not being able to help that person..
:: having the courage to say I LOVE YOU to the person you love and finding out afterwards that things will never be the same again when he/she doesnt treat you with the same closeness as before
:: having to face the fact that someone is capable of completely destroying the wall that you have set for yourself, leaving you weak and vulnerable
:: admitting that you love someove despite his imperfections
:: finding out that the more you try to hate him, the more you end up loving him, perhaps even more than before
:: realizing how stupid your mistakes were that led to your break-up
:: the thought that this guy, used to really love you and you loved him aswell but you didn't give enough and he gave up on you
:: Sharing the one you love with SOMEBODY else..
:: making a promise.. and realizing that when the time has come for that promise to be delivered.. the commitment is no longer there..
:: the hardest thing about love - believing it exists.
After you've been hurt.. learn to forgive.. learn to trust and love again
=) Im all alone right now. Momskie attended a dinner party with my sis. I've got nothing else to do, so im blogging. I have 3 piercings na! ^__^ Haha. I went to the saloon yesterday for a hair treatment and so I pierced my ear narin. Haha! I now have 2 piercings on my left ear. I could still feel the pain tho.. It takes 1 week before I could change the earring. Im planning to have another piercing on my right ear after my O Levels. ^__^ Sa ear catridge. Hehe.. astig! Neway we had our individual pictorial na kanina lang. After recess, everyone in the class were busy putting their neckties on and the girls fixing themselves. Vain. Haha! Like im not! x) And then everyone headed to the conference r0om. The backgr0und sucked, it was cl0udy dark blue. Haha! & It wasn't over!, we continued fixing ourselves. See h0w vain we are! Lol! x) Nagaagawan ng mirrors. Punas ng tissue sa face. Suklay dito, suklay d0on. Inaayusan ang isat isa. Haha! Nakakatuwa! I was kinda nerv0us when it was time for my turn. xb The ph0tographer was like, sit d0wn facing 45 degrees, fix y0ur tie, push back one side of the hair, straight body, chin up, look at the camere, smile. Tsk! Ang daming arte! Lol. He t0ok 2 shots of me and I was d0ne. Phew! I stayed a while to watch the others. s0me of them were really funny! Hehe! I then decided to go back to class. I reached the classr0om and f0und my only my seatmate & our Chem teacher inside. Wh0a.. the class was empty. Astigness. We g0t back our test paper. I was so relieved. Teacher was happy f0r me. My seatmate wanted to kill me. x) Na perfect ko Chem ko! Yihee! I t0p the class! ^__^ wh0a.. im no smarty pants, perhaps it was just a miracle! Hahaha! Teacher made me write out the c0rrecti0n on the b0ard [it suck.] beacause she said since i've g0t only a few c0rrecti0ns to make. But then, 84 is not a g0od mark yet. Im a perfecti0nist, and im aiming f0r 90 above. Yuck, geek. Haha! Altleast i've made my parents pr0ud. =) And im h0ping they w0uld buy a 7610 f0r me. Wahaha. Yihee! April f0ol is t0morrow! Better watch out, guys. Haha! At the same day, our Friday classes starts. Gawd. =( Our only off day is Sunday. Im s0o0o stressed! Damn it! On saturday is our Family Potrait [class pic, the class calls it Family Potrait x)] And on Sunday, the class w0uld be going to RiverView Poolside for the magazine class activity. I'm not g0ing. Yea, my ch0ice. So where am I g0ing? Yea, im g0ing f0r an educati0nal trip instead. A place called tuiti0n. God, my life is so b0ring. x|
=) Im all alone right now. Momskie attended a dinner party with my sis. I've got nothing else to do, so im blogging. I have 3 piercings na! ^__^ Haha. I went to the saloon yesterday for a hair treatment and so I pierced my ear narin. Haha! I now have 2 piercings on my left ear. I could still feel the pain tho.. It takes 1 week before I could change the earring. Im planning to have another piercing on my right ear after my O Levels. ^__^ Sa ear catridge. Hehe.. astig! Neway we had our individual pictorial na kanina lang. After recess, everyone in the class were busy putting their neckties on and the girls fixing themselves. Vain. Haha! Like im not! x) And then everyone headed to the conference r0om. The backgr0und sucked, it was cl0udy dark blue. Haha! & It wasn't over!, we continued fixing ourselves. See h0w vain we are! Lol! x) Nagaagawan ng mirrors. Punas ng tissue sa face. Suklay dito, suklay d0on. Inaayusan ang isat isa. Haha! Nakakatuwa! I was kinda nerv0us when it was time for my turn. xb The ph0tographer was like, sit d0wn facing 45 degrees, fix y0ur tie, push back one side of the hair, straight body, chin up, look at the camere, smile. Tsk! Ang daming arte! Lol. He t0ok 2 shots of me and I was d0ne. Phew! I stayed a while to watch the others. s0me of them were really funny! Hehe! I then decided to go back to class. I reached the classr0om and f0und my only my seatmate & our Chem teacher inside. Wh0a.. the class was empty. Astigness. We g0t back our test paper. I was so relieved. Teacher was happy f0r me. My seatmate wanted to kill me. x) Na perfect ko Chem ko! Yihee! I t0p the class! ^__^ wh0a.. im no smarty pants, perhaps it was just a miracle! Hahaha! Teacher made me write out the c0rrecti0n on the b0ard [it suck.] beacause she said since i've g0t only a few c0rrecti0ns to make. But then, 84 is not a g0od mark yet. Im a perfecti0nist, and im aiming f0r 90 above. Yuck, geek. Haha! Altleast i've made my parents pr0ud. =) And im h0ping they w0uld buy a 7610 f0r me. Wahaha. Yihee! April f0ol is t0morrow! Better watch out, guys. Haha! At the same day, our Friday classes starts. Gawd. =( Our only off day is Sunday. Im s0o0o stressed! Damn it! On saturday is our Family Potrait [class pic, the class calls it Family Potrait x)] And on Sunday, the class w0uld be going to RiverView Poolside for the magazine class activity. I'm not g0ing. Yea, my ch0ice. So where am I g0ing? Yea, im g0ing f0r an educati0nal trip instead. A place called tuiti0n. God, my life is so b0ring. x|
Waaah! School re-opened today. First thing in the morning, we had a freakinn assembly. Haha! Got our D Maths test 1 paper today & yay! ^__^ I passed! I got a Credit. Damn, first time in my secondary history. Hahaha! Neh0ots, didn't bl0gged yesterday because the DSL m0dem got freaked. Sigh~ yesterday was Easter sunday so yeahh we went to church. Second mass, as usual. I was sooo sleepy during the mass! 0=) It took a long time pa kase there was Baptisms. The mass ended at 11 sumthin and it usually ends at 10.30. Wooooh! Went out of the church and Arvy saw me. He was with Conan. He introduced Conan to me, this time personally. We shook hands and I did not even knew papa was there and he saw the whole scene! Ahaha! Good thing he did not mention anything about it. Lol! Gawd, it was the first time again that I ever held a guys hand.. *deep sigh* Okay, what am I saying here!? Haha! Moving on.. Guess what..? Im stressed again. =( We have so many projects nanaman especially in English! Damn it. Our individual graduation pictorial is on thursday. And class pictorial is on the 2nd of April. I'll post the pics once it is developed. =) Man, I can't believe im graduating.. Time flies really, really fast! April is approaching and so we have 5 months left before the O Level. Gawd.. Papa said a while ago that I might be going back to Phils on November. So I could take my entrance exam on December. Which means too, that I would be spending my 16th birthday, Christmas & New Year there. In my mind, I was like, holy.. shit. There is no friggin way Im leaving on November! Because I have plans too! Waaaah! =( I have a sad life, don't you think? =P If only, I could continue my studies in Australia. [Canning, damn it.] I don't think im ready to go back to my country. It just suck. Im not ready. But hey, he said 'MIGHT'! ^__^ So I still have hopes! Hahah! Perhaps I could convince them. Since I have to wait for my O Level results, which might come out at the end of January. That is already a valid reason, right!? Wahahaha. Im hoping that there won't be any December entrance exam in Lasalle. Hahahaha!
I just chatted with Achie Alpha in msn.. I told her about my friggin lovelife problem. Honestly, she's the only person who understands my situation. She was giving me advices and ako naman todo iyak lang. Hinde ko napilitan, I had to cry it out. It hurts inside eh. Badly.. I realized na ako yung my pr0blem. Hinde ako makapagmove on. Pero e2 na, im ready & willing to leave it all behind. What i've been d0ing for the past m0nths.., damn.. it was all non-sense craps. We live in different w0rlds.. & He does not deserve me. He deserves s0meone better.. Someone.. who would be there for him whenever he needs her.. Kung sino man yung dadating sa life nia na bago.. sana it would be someone who won't hurt him and would love him like I did (still do..) And past will be past. Second chances? Time will tell. Hinde rin naman ako umaasa.., and ayokong umasa. I'll leave it to Fate. I STILL LOVE HIM.. but I have to let go.., even if it hurts like hell inside..
A song especially dedicated to him..
Before I Let You Go Freestyle
I can still remember yesterday
We were so in love in a special way
And knowing that you loved me
Made me feel oh so right
But now I feel lost, don't know what to do
Each and every day I think of you
Holdin' back the tears
I'm trying with all my might
Because you've gone and left me standing all alone
And I know I've got to face tomorrow
On my own...
But baby before I let you go
I want to say I love you
I hope that you're list'nin
''Coz it's true, baby
You'll be forever in my heart
And I know that no one else will do
So before I let you go
I want to say it... I love you
I wish that It could be just like before
I know I could've given you so much more
Even though you know
I'd given you all my love
I miss your smile, I miss your kiss
Each and every day I reminisce
'Coz baby it's you
That i'm always dreaming of...
Because you've gone and left me standing all alone
And I know I've got to face tomorrow
On my own...
But baby before I let you go
I want to say I love you
I hope that you're list'nin
''Coz it's true, baby
You'll be forever in my heart
And I know that no one else will do
So before I let you go
I want to say it...
Cause letting love go
Is never easy
But I love you so
That's why I set you free
And I know someday
Somehow, I'll find a way
To leave it all behind me
'Guess it wasn't meant to be
But baby...
Before I let you go
I want to say I love you
I hope that you're list'nin
''Coz it's true, baby
You'll be forever in my heart
And I know that no one else will do
So before I let you go
I want to say it... I love you..
